1)
Listen to your children!
 Turn
off the TV or stop what you are doing and take a moment to listen
to your children and what they have to say. You might just learn
something. If children want to tell us something and we continue
to click through our emails or pick things up around the house as
they are talking, they are going to think we don’t care or
think what they have to say isn’t important. The key to listening
is to stop talking both internally and externally. Sometimes we
can be silent and make others think we are listening but our minds
are going a mile a minute, we find ourselves hearing every other
word. To listen is to hear but also give them eye contact and to
say things like:
- Who was
with you?
- I can’t
believe that happen to you.
- How did
you get there in the first place?
- Do you
want a hug?
- I am here
for you.
- Wow that
is so cool.
- I am so
proud of you.
- I bet you
are very proud of yourself.
2) Follow
through on your promises.
I hear so
many parents say to their kids. “If you do that one more time
we are going home” The kid does it again and the parent never
takes the child home. If you don’t want to leave a party or
event don’t tell your child things like that. Another example
is a parent promising a child to take his child out for a special
night and never finding time to do it. The key to good communication
is to follow through with what you say. If you mean it say it-if
you don’t, don’t!
3) Cheer
on your children.
 Children
love to be told how great they are. Even when you think they don’t
care to hear praise they do. Even the middle school/high school
students love to hear how successful they are. Let face it we all
like to here that we are doing it right. I think it is sad that
we live in a society where the squeaky wheel gets the grease. It’s
time that we change that at home by speaking louder when we praise
and softer when we reprimand.
4) Be
polite to your Children.
If you want
your children to say please and thank you, you should too.
I hear some many parents say: get that or give me that, and when
the child gives them what they want they say nothing. Please and
Thank you go a long way.
My wife has
corrected me more than once when I have asked her to get me something.
She will say “Please….” Or after she gives me
it she will say “Thank…” Our children are following
our lead and if I am not polite they won’t be either.
Today start
by saying please and remember to say thank you.
5) Have
a family fun night.
 Set
a night a side to have some fun with your children. Hide and seek,
flash light tag, board games or treasure hunts are a great way to
loosen up and open the lines of communications. Forget about the
boss or the bills and really spend some time with your child, she
will never forget it.
6) If
you were wrong tell them.
I believe
the best parents are the ones that can admit when they are wrong.
I remember losing my temper with my oldest Nicholas when he was
six years old.
When I came
to my senses and looked at this terrified little guy with tears
in his eyes I knew I was way out of line. I hugged him and apologized
for directing the days stress on him. I promised him that would
never happen again and it won’t.
7) Every
day tell them that you love them.
 There
isn’t a day that goes by that I don’t tell each of my
children how much I love them. I don’t care if they are in
high school or college. Tell them you love them.
For some reason
it is easy to say we love them when they are cute and cuddly and
forget to when they are all grown up. The same goes true with your
spouse. Tell her you love her everyday even in front of the kids
and they will share their love and become respectful, responsible
examples of love.
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